Bloggy,

Because you're always asking for ages and specifics, I'll do my best here. I'm a 20-year-old guy going to college in (city redacted). I didn't start school until this year. I basically woke up one day last week and realized that I have no social life. I go to class, I have a job and I pretty much just stay at home. I live a bit off-campus in an apartment. It's quiet and everything, but I guess that's my problem. I really don't know how to meet people and it's really starting to bug me. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

-Joe

Most social advice given to young metriculators goes something like this: You're in the prime of your life and you're surrounded by people with whom you have so much in common. Join some clubs, hang out in some local cafes, strike up conversations with your classmates. Etc, etc.

But there's a little more nuance, especially in cases like yours, Joe. A lot of people who had great social experiences in college have at least one thing in common: they all started at the same time and in the same situation. It's remarkably easy to make friends when you're 18, fresh out of high school and jammed into a dorm with a bunch of other 18-year-olds who are fresh out of high school. Freshman dorms are nothing if not tapestries of youthful insecurities. It's no surprise, then, that the scared, awed newbies start to cluster.

For kids like that, forming a social circle is practically a given. The problem is that young folks are unnecessarily cliquey. Once a group forms around something as arbitrary and inherently exclusive as a dorm hallway, it's hard to break through that shell. Lucky for you, Joe, a lot of the best people you'll meet in college grow beyond that kind of behavior in short order. I wouldn't advise you to move into a dorm, especially since you've known the simple pleasure of having your own space.

All of this having been said... You're in the prime of your life and you're surrounded by people with whom you have so much in common. Join some clubs, hang out in some local cafes, strike up conversations with your classmates.

But honestly, Joe, a little bit of effort goes a long way. People get together for all sorts of stupid reasons, all with the real intent of just goofing around and making friends. There's always a pick-up soccer game somewhere, always a group of gamers looking to fill an open seat for their next tabletop RPG, always some free event your city's parks and recreation department has sponsored just to get people interested in a neglected green space. To quote the great Robert "Dylan" Zimmerman, "When you got nothing, you got nothing to lose". The worst thing that can happen if you just start a conversation with a stranger is that he or she tells you, in so many words, to screw off. At best, you'll have made a friend for life. Seems worth the risk, doesn't it?